Skip to main content

Friday Funnies!




Happy Friday everybody! I'm linking up with Kim at Homesteader's Heart to add a little cheer to the world today. Here's my contribution:


A doctor was addressing a large audience in Oxford ...


"The material we put into our stomachs should have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is full of steroids and dye. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High transfat diets can be disastrous and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. But, there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and most of us have, or will eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"


After several seconds of quiet, a 70-year-old man in the front row raised his hand, and softly said, "Wedding Cake."

Comments

  1. AnonymousApril 1, 2011 at 7:01 AM

    I LOVE YOU!!! YOU always make me smile.
    Hugs and blessings,
    Bren

    ReplyDelete
  2. Kim @ Homesteader's HeartApril 1, 2011 at 7:04 AM

    OH MY GOODNESS! That was hilarious.
    Thanks for the laugh my friend.
    Have an excellent weekend.
    Kim

    ReplyDelete
  3. Heather HartApril 1, 2011 at 7:07 AM

    That's horrible! Thanks so much for the laugh!

    ReplyDelete
  4. no spring chickenApril 1, 2011 at 8:28 AM

    Ha! Good one... :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. MikkiApril 1, 2011 at 8:37 AM

    Oh my goodness.. that was good..
    Stop by via the Friday FUnnies

    ReplyDelete
  6. PeggyApril 1, 2011 at 5:23 PM

    Thanks for the laugh today.

    ReplyDelete
  7. http://bitsandpieces-sonja.blogspot.com/April 1, 2011 at 5:58 PM

    oh yikes Mary...

    I just posted my comment on your serious wonderful blog blow this. I'm so sorry... here it is in the appropriate place:


    Mary my friend...

    just trust me when I tell you that I NEEDED this hearty laugh today!!!

    xo

    ReplyDelete
  8. Beth E.April 1, 2011 at 7:19 PM

    Hahaha! My hubby might agree with that on some days! ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  9. RCUBEsApril 1, 2011 at 7:54 PM

    You always share the best! I need this sister and thank you! May you have a lovely weekend ahead, remaining strong in His mighty power! God bless and love you sister.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Surprise at the Mall

I lost touch with a writer friend.  I missed her and her cheerful blog posts.  We met up in a most unusual way!  I’m still in awe of how it happened. I finished my shopping at the mall and took a short cut to get to the parking lot.  The path led me through the food court.  The smell of Chicken Fajitas stopped me in my tracks.  I planned lunch elsewhere, but now I followed my nose. I chewed my first bite of chicken taco salad when, out of nowhere, a loud redhead moved rapidly past the tables and into the booth with me.  “I know you !”  She shouted.  I pondered if I knew this crazy lady.  Did she mistake me for someone else?  She shouted louder and stuck her finger in my face:  “ You’re Mary; you have a blog called Pile of Smiles and you live in the Verde Valley .”   It took me a second to compose myself.  I stopped chewing my food.  I know I stared too long at her face and then she said:...
48 comments
Read more

A Memorial Day Reflection

  Memorial Day is always noteworthy for me and my girls.  Next Thursday marks the third year of missing their father, my husband. So many thoughts  run through my mind.  The journey of loss takes on various emotions.  The strongest feeling, at first, was emptiness.  In a split second, I would forget he departed forever.  I imagined things I needed to talk to him about when he got back home.  My mind is realistic now.  He's not coming back.  There will be no more times of sitting on the porch swing together on the front deck staring at the moon and the stars.  He would tell me all he knew about the majestic night sky. I have so much I wish I could tell him, like the excitement of seeing our oldest grandchild make a decision to follow Jesus and get baptized on Mother's Day!  And our little Amy, 11 years old, I wish he could have seen her on stage receiving her induction to the National Honor Society. Our daughters have their own ...
23 comments
Read more

Mama's Lipstick

I always wished I could do things with my mom like shop in the mall, share makeup secrets or go to the movies and watch romantic comedies.  My wish never materialized.     My mama behaved like a tomboy.   She loved baseball and pitched with a strong right arm.   She could care less about the latest fashion or the latest movies featured on the big screen.   She never polished her fingernails.    One day after elementary school, I walked into the house to find my mom all dolled up in front of the bathroom mirror, foundation crème, powder, eyebrow pencil and rouge all over the counter sink.  “Who are you?” I asked, thrilled to see my mama putting on the Ritz.  Makeup in place and blotted, she immediately took it off.  “I don’t like the way it feels,” she exclaimed. She retired in Arizona and protected her dry lips with a light rose lipstick, the color of natural lips, a step above ChapStick.  She wore it a few tim...
55 comments
Read more