Skip to main content

Friday Funnies!

I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particulary dirty and shabby looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner. I took out my wallet, got out ten dollars and asked "If I give you this money, will you go shopping instead of buying food?" I asked. "No, I don't waste time shopping," the homeless woman said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."

"Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?" I asked. "Are you nuts!" replied the homeless woman. I haven't had my hair done in 20 years.

"Well, I am not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you out to dinner with my husband and me tonight." The homeless woman was shocked. "Won't your husband be furious with you for doing that? I know that I'm dirty and I probably smell pretty disgusting."

I said, "That's okay. It is important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, and hair appointments.




Kim features more humor at Friday Funnies! Have a great day.

Comments

  1. Oh Mary! THAT is funny! I need to remember that one.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh I love that joke but the picture is what finishes is off with a bang! LOL!
    Happy Friday my friend.
    Kim

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh Mary !! I always LOVE your FF!! Happy Friday my dear friend!!
    Love you

    ReplyDelete
  4. My goodness . . . my goodness . . . what am I going to do with you?
    You know I need prayer today and a good laugh!!! Thank you my friend.
    Please pray for me too. I sense spirtual warfare near me.
    Blessings,
    Bren

    ReplyDelete
  5. Woo Hoo, that is so funny, lol

    ReplyDelete
  6. OMGoodness, that is hilarious!! Will definitely be showing my sweet hubby so that never crosses his mind!!

    Love and Blessings to you my friend!!

    I am having a giveaway, posted yesterday!! Come by and sign up if you get a chance!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Oh, toooo funny! I'm going to show Duller this when he gets home. Oh, wait, I gave up shopping and hair appointments years ago... HEY, that's my picture! LOLOL!

    Love ya loads, sweet thang!
    Have a JESUS-filled day! ^i^

    ReplyDelete
  8. Gotta' share this with my DH, too! LOL...I'm glad there's no one around me to hear I'm cracking up right now. I must have looked crazy from outside the window though to those who'll see me. God bless sister. Have a great weekend!

    ReplyDelete
  9. hi mary. got here from denise's site. thank you for your prayers for lanie and her family. it is very much appreciated. it is so unfortunate that things like this happen, but they do. things are done differently here in the philippines. even i was furious when i learned about it. but i know our God is a great God and He will make a way.

    thank you for praying. God bless you.

    ReplyDelete
  10. LOL Or leaving the house a mess when they think we do nothing all day.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Veteran's Story

  I noticed Bill sitting in our local park where I walk.   He glanced my way just as I finished the last exercise walk song on my playlist.   He shouted and pointed to my car:   “Hey, is that your car with the Nam front license plate?   I stepped closer into the veranda where Bill sat on a picnic bench.   I noticed his Vietnam Vet cap and instantly I knew why I walked there that day.   The Marine Vet served during the 1960’s, the same time span as my husband.   Bill talked a lot about the war evoking my emotions from laughter to tears.   My South Vietnam front plate often prompts a conversation with a stranger and I’ve learned a deep respect for it over the years.   It is my way of listening to a veteran.   I enjoyed listening to Bill.   He made me laugh in spots but he made me cry as well.   Like when he talked about the sandwich lady.   “Do you ever eat at the sandwich shop in the gas station down the street...

A Memorial Day Reflection

  Memorial Day is always noteworthy for me and my girls.  Next Thursday marks the third year of missing their father, my husband. So many thoughts  run through my mind.  The journey of loss takes on various emotions.  The strongest feeling, at first, was emptiness.  In a split second, I would forget he departed forever.  I imagined things I needed to talk to him about when he got back home.  My mind is realistic now.  He's not coming back.  There will be no more times of sitting on the porch swing together on the front deck staring at the moon and the stars.  He would tell me all he knew about the majestic night sky. I have so much I wish I could tell him, like the excitement of seeing our oldest grandchild make a decision to follow Jesus and get baptized on Mother's Day!  And our little Amy, 11 years old, I wish he could have seen her on stage receiving her induction to the National Honor Society. Our daughters have their own ...

Scary Scars

A young trouble-lovin’ neighbor boy managed to scare me back in my preschool days.  My mom sent me to our neighbor’s house where Freddie hid in the shrubs and jumped out at me wearing his Frankenstein mask loaded with scars.  I screamed every time.   I’ve had to forgive Freddie for harassing me when these memories pop up.  I’m sure he grew up to be a swell guy and if I could remember his last name I would look him up on social media and yell at him. Those Scars! The scars on the mask looked real to me, a six year old timid girl.  What is it about scars that creep us out like that? When I think of scars, I think of pain.  I don’t like to see people suffer.  Scars  are areas of fibrous tissue (fibrosis) that replace normal skin after injury. A  scar  results from the biological process of wound repair in the skin and other tissues of the body. Thus,  scarring  is a natural part of the healing proce...