Skip to main content

Friday Funnies


How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Charismatics: Only 1
their hands are already in the air.

Pentecostals: 10
One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirits of darkness.

Presbyterians: None
Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Baptists: At least 15.
One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken. .....and they all said, "Amen!"

Episcopalians: 3
One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.

Methodists: Undetermined
whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.

Amish:
What's a light bulb?

Quakers: None
The congregation will sit quietly thinking and meditating on light bulb changing.

Nazarenes: 6
One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

Lutherans: None
Lutherans don't believe in change.

Eastern Orthodox: Three to look into purchasing the bulb for as inexpensive as possible and 50 to plan the ethnic festival for the light bulb changing

Catholics: None - Candles only.

Thank you, Kim, for hosting Friday Funnies!

Comments

  1. OH that is hilarious my friend. I had never heard that one. Big laughs!
    Happy Friday my sweet friend.
    Kim

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh this is great! I loved it! So true to form.

    Have a great day, my friend.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I have a book somewhere just full of lightbulb jokes!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh, those are funny! Thanks for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
  5. TGIF and it's time for your Friday Funnies. Thank you sister for the laugh!!! Like what you said, we need to...I appreciate the prayer you prayed over me. I needed that.
    If I may do the same for you: Lord, I lift up sister Mary as she plans to visit her sister and other families in Illinois. Please keep her safe and that there will be no hassle with this trip. Protect her and her family Oh Lord. May it be a fruitful reunion and may others who don't know You be able to know Your love and grace because of sister Mary. Please guide her with Your divine wisdom. Thank You Lord that we can come together and pray together. Thank you Lord that we share that oneness that only comes from You. In Jesus' Name. Amen. Have fun sister! [[[Hugs]]].

    ReplyDelete
  6. I laughed A LOT at this today. Thanks for the Friday Funnies.

    Christy

    ReplyDelete
  7. Cute! I hadn't heard that one. I'd fall into the Baptist category and would bring mac & cheese and steer the committee for light bulb changing, LOL!

    Thanks, by the way, for stopping by At the Well and leaving such a sweet comment. What a blessing you are!

    ReplyDelete
  8. What great fun! I hope your trip is filled with wonderful memory-making connections.

    Off to change my Baptilupentpresalian light bulb!

    Kathleen

    ReplyDelete
  9. I wanna' share the "awesome queen" award with you so c'mon over when you get a chance! Love you.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Daisy House

I work at my desktop with the children at my feet.  A makeshift area rug made of white butcher paper lines the floor where the baby, crayon in hand, imitates her big sister.  Sister focuses on the finishing touches of the house she designed.  The catchy children’s song, Wheels of the Bus, blasts from the Toddler Station on Pandora Radio. Six year old Sookie unveils her masterpiece and I ooh and awe at the sketch.  “It’s a daisy house!”  I exclaim.  “I love the colors.  I wonder what the inside looks like.”  Without hesitating, Sookie describes each room.  “There are five rooms and they are all different colors.  One is Mint Chip, another Strawberry.  There is a Vanilla room, and a Cookies & Cream room and the last room is Rocky Road.  You have to wear a sweater inside because it is very cold.” “A house made of ice cream,” I reply.  “It sounds heavenly!” I dug into my Bible readings that morning ...

A Memorial Day Reflection

  Memorial Day is always noteworthy for me and my girls.  Next Thursday marks the third year of missing their father, my husband. So many thoughts  run through my mind.  The journey of loss takes on various emotions.  The strongest feeling, at first, was emptiness.  In a split second, I would forget he departed forever.  I imagined things I needed to talk to him about when he got back home.  My mind is realistic now.  He's not coming back.  There will be no more times of sitting on the porch swing together on the front deck staring at the moon and the stars.  He would tell me all he knew about the majestic night sky. I have so much I wish I could tell him, like the excitement of seeing our oldest grandchild make a decision to follow Jesus and get baptized on Mother's Day!  And our little Amy, 11 years old, I wish he could have seen her on stage receiving her induction to the National Honor Society. Our daughters have their own ...

The Final Chapter

Are you like me when you join a new group of people? Do you navigate the crowd wondering where you fit in the best?  I felt insecure when I joined Word Weavers, a Christian writing group in our town.  Liz and Tony welcomed me with their accepting smiles.  It meant a lot. I sat with Liz in a small critique group one week.  I leaned in close so we could share a writer’s paper together.  She mentioned she would passively kick back and listen because she felt sick that day.  Tony kept his eye on her walking over with a plate of cookies and a hug for his wife.  But Liz did not eat. Last week, Liz passed away.  I attended the memorial service where I learned that Liz was a dreamer and fought for her dreams up to the very end!  Liz’s dream, her third book Jamie , came true.  The publisher approved her manuscript and moved heaven and earth to get the story printed in book form and delivered to Liz.  ...