Skip to main content

Friday Funnies!


Toward the end of Sunday service, the minister asked: “How many of you have forgiven your enemies?” 80% held up their hands. The minister then repeated his question. All responded this time, except one small elderly lady. “Mrs. Neely? Are you not willing to forgive your enemies?”
“I don't have any.” She replied, smiling sweetly. “Mrs. Neely, that is very unusual. How old are you?” “Ninety-eight,” she replied. The congregation stood up and clapped their hands.
“Oh, Mrs. Neely, would you please come down in front & tell all of us how a person can live ninety-eight years and not have an enemy in the world?”' The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, faced the congregation and said, “I outlived all those bums.”




Kim and the funny ladies at Friday Funnies are ready to make you laugh this Friday so be sure to drop by! Have a great weekend everyone.

Comments

  1. http://bitsandpieces-sonja.blogspot.com/August 20, 2010 at 6:13 AM

    I just LOVE your Friday stories! I am laughing out loud right now!! Great way to begin this Friday! :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. JackieAugust 20, 2010 at 8:03 AM

    I'm with Sonja, Mary! Your Friday Funnies always crack me up!!

    Have a blessed and filled with smiles weekend!!

    Luv, Hugs and Sweet Blessings!
    Jackie

    ReplyDelete
  3. DeniseAugust 20, 2010 at 8:10 AM

    I love this, lol

    ReplyDelete
  4. roselAugust 20, 2010 at 9:30 AM

    Where do you get your good jokes sister Mary? You never run out! And I get to enjoy 'em all every Friday! Yipee! Thank you. Especially at this time I could use some laughter...My pain is easing up a bit. But I'm still taking things slowly. Can't afford to reinjure whatever muscle I hurt! I didn't know I have a muscle there on my right shoulder. Until I hurt it! :) Thank you for your sweet thoughts and feeling all those wonderful prayers! Keeping you in mine. Have a great weekend. Oopppsss. I need to pick up my denture. It fell when I laughed!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Debbie PetrasAugust 20, 2010 at 11:02 AM

    Ah Mary that is very funny. At least she is very honest.

    ReplyDelete
  6. AngelAugust 20, 2010 at 12:00 PM

    I love this!! Too funny

    ReplyDelete
  7. Kim @ Homesteader's HeartAugust 20, 2010 at 1:33 PM

    Oh THAT is funny! I love it.
    Thank you my friend.
    I hope you have a great weekend.
    Kim

    ReplyDelete
  8. Deborah AnnAugust 20, 2010 at 4:11 PM

    Aw...and here I was leaning in to learn her secret! Lol!

    ReplyDelete
  9. AnonymousAugust 20, 2010 at 6:13 PM

    I too love your Friday Funnies!!! You are a blessing my friend.
    Bren

    ReplyDelete
  10. AndreaAugust 20, 2010 at 8:34 PM

    That is hilarious! Again, you always make me smile! :) You have a precious gift.

    I hope you're doing well and enjoying life as the summer winds down (and hopefully the scorching heat).

    Much love,

    Andrea

    ReplyDelete
  11. Susan BAugust 20, 2010 at 11:15 PM

    Lol...this is too cute! Have a wonderful weekend Mary! :)

    ReplyDelete
  12. LOVE, MERCY AND GRACE...GOD'S GRACEAugust 21, 2010 at 6:34 AM

    Too funny!! Found you from way at Beth at Outnumbered 3 to 1 for Friday Funnies!

    ~Beth

    ReplyDelete
  13. TeresaAugust 21, 2010 at 9:57 AM

    I love to laugh! Thank you for this post!!!! It's my 'Saturday Funnies'..heehee!

    ReplyDelete
  14. SophieMaeAugust 21, 2010 at 9:05 PM

    LOL! OK, even though I kinda saw it coming, I spewed my tea! Thanks ever so for spreading the joy!

    Have a JESUS-filled day! ^i^

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Memorial Day Reflection

  Memorial Day is always noteworthy for me and my girls.  Next Thursday marks the third year of missing their father, my husband. So many thoughts  run through my mind.  The journey of loss takes on various emotions.  The strongest feeling, at first, was emptiness.  In a split second, I would forget he departed forever.  I imagined things I needed to talk to him about when he got back home.  My mind is realistic now.  He's not coming back.  There will be no more times of sitting on the porch swing together on the front deck staring at the moon and the stars.  He would tell me all he knew about the majestic night sky. I have so much I wish I could tell him, like the excitement of seeing our oldest grandchild make a decision to follow Jesus and get baptized on Mother's Day!  And our little Amy, 11 years old, I wish he could have seen her on stage receiving her induction to the National Honor Society. Our daughters have their own ...
24 comments
Read more

The Lesson in the Middle

I wanted to dance when I heard the good news.  I don’t need surgery! When my doctor examined me last month, he suspected further care and sent me to a specialist in a city up north.  I had to wait only two weeks to get in to see him.  The specialist did not agree about surgery so I’m off the hook. I learned an important lesson about my faith journey in the middle of the two-week period of waiting for my appointment to see the specialist. I needed to be educated in medical knowledge and procedures so I could make a wise judgment for my future.  A friend suggested a support group with other women so I could glean info.  I joined.  I listened to their experiences and gained understanding.  I researched like crazy.  I became smart. I also became fearful and sometimes angry.  I screamed at Baby, our spirited cockatiel, to shut up when he screeched too much and I noticed my husband spent more time in his man cave. You kno...
25 comments
Read more

Abba's Lap

I noticed a behavior pattern in little Amy, twenty months old, that I want to imitate.  She moves fast engaging in one toddler activity after another spinning like a whirlwind from one room to another.  Yet, she pauses,  intermittently , long enough to get refreshed.   I want to be like this grandchild of mine because she knows where to go and how to get comforted. Amy moves at record speed, putting more miles on a pedometer in one hour than my accumulated weekly workouts at the gym.  She can build a skyscraper so tall, I wonder why those bright pink Lego’s don’t topple to the ground as she continues to stack just one more piece on top. I learned never to leave the room to get another cup of coffee.  Once, when I returned, I found her climbing past the couch with hands and feet reaching for the living room drapes. She has a consistent habit that I admire.  In the midst of her activities, as she moves robustly from one play...
51 comments
Read more